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Thursday, March 17, 2005
Conflict? Ask Ken: Are Some Offenses Unforgivable?
Put Yourself in His Shoes
Last week, I recounted the unique experience of Simon Wiesenthal, a Jewish concentration camp prisoner, at the bedside of a dying Nazi. The Nazi recounted his horrific crimes and asked this Jewish stranger for forgiveness. Though Wiesenthal made his decision, which is detailed in last week’s posting, years later Wiesenthal wanted to know what others thought they would do. The last paragraph of part one to his book, “The Sunflower,” ends as follows: “You, who have just read this sad and tragic episode in my life, can mentally change places with me and ask yourself the crucial question, “What would I have done?”
Are Some Offenses Unforgivable?
In the second half of the book, dozens of well-known people responded, a few of which I will share with you. Said one, “No matter what the criminals – the men and women who planned, authorized, collaborated in, and carried out such ac¬tions – say afterward, the crime of the Holocaust remains un¬forgivable. How can a criminal be forgiven for an unforgivable crime?” (p. 187). Another responded, “he [the Nazi] stepped over the line where forgiveness is possible. That SS officer should take up his case with God. I personally think he should go to hell and rot there. I doubt very much that my God would grant him forgiveness. After all, what does it take to serve in hell?” (p. 243).
Such responses require an answer to the following questions, “are some offenses unforgivable? To me, the answer from the New Testament is clear. Apart from the sin against the Holy Spirit (which is against God), Jesus teaches, “truly, I say to you, all sins will be forgiven the sons of men, and whatever blasphemies they utter” (Mark 3:28). That is to say, no sin that we commit against each other is outside the pale of God’s forgiveness. As the apostle Paul beautifully wrote, “where sin increased, grace abounded all the more” (Romans 5:20). Indeed, such was Paul’s own personal experience (1 Tim. 1:13). He concluded, “the saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost” (1 Tim. 1:15). Moreover, if we have received God’s forgiveness upon confession of our sins we are obligated to offer our own to others who do the same (Mat. 6:12-14, 18:21-35).
This Biblical truth may not make forgiving a person who has caused you great pain any easier. However it seems clear that a person cannot go beyond the boundary of forgiveness, both divine and human.
What About Wiesenthal’s Response?
Wiesenthal responded to the dying Nazi with silence. The majority of respondents did not find fault with Wiesenthal, a traumatized prisoner. I stand among them and for much the same reason as many: this soldier’s sin was not against Wiesenthal. Therefore, he was not in a position to forgive him. If John hurts Joe, Susie who is a stranger to that relationship, is simply not able to stand in Joe’s place to heal that relationship.
Here is a sampling of thoughts. One person wrote, “I don't see how in any genuinely meaningful sense one individual can offer forgiveness for crimes that were not committed against him” (p. 108). Said another, “the only one who can forgive is the one who has experienced the injury” (p. 265). A third person wrote, “I may forgive one who has sinned against me, I may not forgive one who has taken the life of another” (p. 119) Someone quoted the poet Dryden who penned, “forgiveness to the injured doth belong.” Finally, one person made this analogy. “There is not much point in saying to a murderer ‘I forgive you for murdering my friend's children’ or to a robber ‘I forgive you for robbing the bank next door’” (p. 108, 1st ed.).
Discussion
Do you think there are some sins that we cannot forgive? Have you ever withheld forgiveness from someone? If so, would you be willing to share the details? Are there some sins that only God can forgive, but we are not expected to? If so, where do you draw the line? Can you share an occasion where your forgiveness of another transformed that relationship? Thanks for sharing.
--
© 2005 Kenneth C. Newberger
Ken Newberger,
an experienced church conflict resolution specialist, earned his Th.M.
from Dallas Theological Seminary, has ten years senior pastoral
experience, and is in the dissertation phase for his Ph.D. in Conflict
Analysis and Resolution at Nova Southeastern University, one of only
two accredited doctoral programs of its kind in the United States. If
your church needs help resolving conflict, if you need individual
coaching, or if you would like to introduce a proactive conflict
management system into your church, please visit Ken's website at www.ResolveChurchConflict.com or call 301-253-8877.
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Are some sins unforgivable?
Ken Newberger stated “Wiesenthal responded to the dying Nazi with silence. The majority of respondents did not find fault with Wiesenthal, a traumatized prisoner. I stand among them and for much the same reason as many: this soldier’s sin was not against Wiesenthal. Therefore, he was not in a position to forgive him. If John hurts Joe, Susie who is a stranger to that relationship, is simply not able to stand in Joe’s place to heal that relationship.”
The analogy used here in this situation does not apply, in that the sin committed by the German or Germans was not a sin against a person, but to a race of people to which Simon Wiesenthal being a Jew belonged. Being part of this race, he had the power to forgive, but not the anointing. As I stated in my earlier post “man without Christ is incapable of forgiving.” Wiesenthal being a Jew was without Christ and his natural reaction was silence.
Christians on the other hand have made peace with God, and have been forgiven their trespasses, and are in a position to forgive sins. We see this very deep spiritual truth in the Lord Jesus Christ. When we accepted Christ as our savior, we become the body of Christ and the presence of Almighty God resides in us through the presence of the Holy Ghost. We are now one with God through Christ in whom we have our being. Part of our commission given to us as believers by Christ was to set the captives free. This means that we are capable to be the mouthpiece for God in stating that God will forgive whatever the sin may be which is a spiritual action. This does not mean that society will forgive the “consequences” of a particular sin such as murder, stealing, ect…. All sin can be forgiven spiritually by God, but society has laws that hold accountable any person that breaks those laws.
As Christians we are a royal priesthood, therefore are able to extend forgiveness to all sinners through Christ, that indwells us and there are no actions or sins that cannot be forgiven except blasphemy against the Holy Ghost.
Posted by: Daniel Zepeda | Mar 17, 2005 11:05:47 AM
I want to share an excerpt from Corrie Ten Booms life story.
Four Ten Booms gave their lives for this family’s commitment, but Corrie came home from the death camp. She realized her life was a gift from God, and she needed to share what she and Betsy had learned in Ravensbruck: "There is no pit so deep that God’s love is not deeper still" and "God will give us the love to be able to forgive our enemies." At age 53, Corrie began a world-wide ministry which took her into more than 60 countries in the next 33 years! She testified to God’s love and encouraged all she met with the message that "Jesus is Victor."
Corrie received many tributes. Corrie was knighted by the Queen of Holland. In 1968, the Holocaust Museum in Jerusalem (Yad Vashem) asked Corrie to plant a tree in the Garden of Righteousness, in honor of the many Jewish lives her family saved. Corrie’s tree stands there today. In the early 1970’s Corrie’s book THE HIDING PLACE became a best seller and World Wide Pictures released the major motion picture "The Hiding Place." Corrie went on to write many other inspiring books and make several evangelical videos.
Corrie was a woman who was faithful to God. She died on her 91st birthday, April 15, 1983. It is interesting that Corrie's passing occurred on her birthday. In the Jewish tradition, it is only very blessed people who are allowed the special privilege of dying on their birthday!
Posted by: Daniel Zepeda | Mar 17, 2005 11:26:10 AM
The act of forgiveness does two things:
It releases the victim and it offers grace to the offender. Whether the offender takes the "grace" offered or not, is not the issue. But what it does for the victim is free his future. Unforgiveness, locks us in time and one can never move forward until one forgives. The "reason" is never an excuse to not forgive.
Posted by: Pastor Al | Mar 17, 2005 11:32:17 AM
I am reminded of Jesus' words in the Sermon on the Mount - right after he teaches us how to pray. He says that if we "do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." (Mt. 6:15) In verse 14 he does say "when they sin against you." I would argue that the Nazi sin was against all mankind and therefore against me.
In my role as a pastor, I regularlly offer people forgiveness for sins that they did not commit against me. It is a starting point, a way to demonstrate that they are valuable and worth forgiving. I continue this work of forgiveness by helping them seek the forgiveness of the specific individuals that their sin has offended.
I try to picture Christ withholding forgiveness from someone who is asking for it and I just can't see it. He may have them "demonstrate some action in keeping with their repentance", but he will forgive.
Dave
Posted by: Dave | Mar 17, 2005 11:56:29 AM
I can't see any justification for witholding forgiveness. It's contrary to what our Lord taught, as far as what seems obvious to me.
...Bernie
http://www.oneplace.com/ministries/247
Posted by: bernie dehler | Mar 21, 2005 1:13:49 AM
I agree with Pastor Al. Forgiveness releases the victim and allows them to move on. Unforgiveness only binds the victim and prevents them from experiencing God's blessings, primarily because they often become consumed with the person at fault and lose sight of God and the mercy and grace he has freely given us.
At it's core, all of us are unforgiving by nature. This stems from the fact that we are selfish and self-centered. And when we chose (and it IS a choice) not to forgive someone we are choosing a very selfish path. We are in essence saying, "I want to have control over this situation and therefore I will not forgive them." Remember, we are either living in the Spirit or we are living in "self."
Unforgiveness is a killer. It raises stress and can even cause physical and psychological issues, it robs our homes of peace and security, and ultimately it takes away our joy that can only be found in Jesus.
Posted by: Tye | Mar 21, 2005 10:23:25 AM
It seems as though one important passage that is central to this dicussion has been left out.
Luke 17:3-4 - "Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him, and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.”
Jesus stated, that "if he repents" then forgive him. We have to recongize that there are two types of forgiveness in the Bible. Jesus said on the cross, "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do." Yet, Jesus wasn't restoring the broken relationship with those who were crucifying him unless of course they first repented.
The question at hand is how does the believer respond to those who have offended him when there isn't any repentance. The answer can be found in Matt. 18:15-17 and in Rom. 12:14-21
At the heart of the Gospel, repentance must come first before forgiveness can offered to restore the relationship between man and God.
Yet, there is a forgiveness that happens outside of repentance. This forgiveness is between the offendee and God to release bitterness and not hold a grudge against the offender.
So we must exercise forgiveness between God and ourselves, but relationships cannot and should not be restored until the offender REPENTS!
Posted by: John Schlaack | Mar 21, 2005 12:09:20 PM
This is a continuation to my comment regarding this topic last week. This week I was meditating on what is blasphemy of the Holy Spirit and this is what came to me. Blasphemy of the Holy Spirit is refusing to be the bride of Christ.
Genesis: 1:27: So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.
Matthew 6:10: Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven.
Ephesians 5
31: For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
32: This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
33: Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
1 Corintheans 13:12: For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.
Posted by: Harry Miller | Mar 21, 2005 3:20:51 PM
I previously wrote:
"I can't see any justification for witholding forgiveness. It's contrary to what our Lord taught, as far as what seems obvious to me."
My daughter pointed out to me Isaiah 2:9. Being so familiar with the message of grace, I forgot about God's wrath... coming "soon" to a person near you...
...Bernie
http://www.oneplace.com/ministries/247
Posted by: bernie dehler | Mar 23, 2005 8:23:09 PM
